In Praise of: Buckfast Abbey tonic wine
There's a bit in Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves when Friar Tuck (played by Mike McShane) extols the virtues of a pint:
"This is grain, which any fool can eat, but for which the Lord intended a more divine means of consumption. Let us give praise to our maker, and glory to His bounty, by learning about... beer."
Apart from sounding like they'd benefit well from being delivered in a Jeremy Clarkson tone, I always think these words apply equally to a certain other alcoholic drink.
Substitute 'grain' for 'grapes', and 'beer' for 'wine' – or rather, Buckfast Tonic Wine – and indeed give praise to God. For this is a tipple that has the hand of God in it. Like, almost literally.
Made by Benedictine monks at Buckfast Abbey in Devon, the eponymous beverage was originally created by the French clerics who settled at the Abbey in the 19th century. Fortifying a base wine from Spain with ingredients that give it its tonic properties, the monks continue to manufacture the wine according to a traditional French recipe.
Described on the label as a 'red wine-based aperitif', Buckfast was originally sold as medicine, before it was re-marketed for a wider appeal. Now it is sold not only in the Abbey's own produce shop, but also nationwide and around the world.
Although you do have to look for it. Not everywhere stocks it, and when you do find somewhere that sells it, the lure of that distinctive orange label can prove hard to resist (at least for me). When I'm in the mood for it, it's as if I'm being pulled by the sound of a heavenly choir (a bit like the one used for the HBO ident: I know! I can't believe it's had that many views either).
And no wonder. This is exactly the sort of thing you can imagine them all drinking in Game of Thrones. Perhaps due to it not being widely available, and to its slightly dubious reputation, Buckfast tonic wine is acquiring a mythology all of its own. Having become associated with binge drinkers in Scotland, earning (according to Wikipedia) nicknames such as 'Wreck the Hoose Juice' and 'Commotion Lotion', it is also apparently popular with 'working class, student and bohemian communities in the United Kingdom and Ireland'.
Well, in addition to 'bohemian communities' (where are they? I want to be part of one!), it's popular in this house, too. What is it about this drink that's so great? I love everything about it, both outside and inside the bottle. While most wines strive to be symbols of good taste and elegance, their labels all merging into each other, that Buckfast label with its clashing colours and retro design, like something from a Ladybird book, stands out on the shelves.
'Aperitif' it may say (perhaps due to its French background), but this is no dainty pre-dinner drink. This is a hardcore, filthy dirty, slaggy drink. If you're feeling frail it really does pick you up. 'Wreck the hoose juice'? In this house we call it 'liquid cocaine' (prompting me to go all Mrs Doyle: "Are you sure, Father? There's cocaine in it!")
I find Buckie easy to drink (as do I imagine, many others), not just because of its effects, but also because of its taste. Like its label, the flavour is distinctive, unusual, and unlike any other wine you're likely to taste (get a load. Seriously. Do. Get a load). Sort of sweet, aniseedy, mixed with Irn Bru and Pepto Bismol. It's a wine made not just from girders, but a shitload of caffeine, and a dead mouse, probably. Who cares? This is wine on steroids. And I like it.
The last time I poured myself a glass of this thick, red-tinged, rusty brown liquor Guy Garvey on 6 Music played Elvis Costello's Pump It Up (I kid you not – there's only one dance you can do to that, a sort of jerky running on the spot, arms bent, head jerking from side to side). If I was feeling low beforehand, I wasn't anymore. It picks me up even when I'm on my period, that's how hard it is. Buckfast tonic wine is even capable of taking police to court. Yeah.
This is beyond wine. I mean, what makes wine wine is all there – grapes, an alcoholic content, and stuff. But oh, it's so much more than that. Rather like port, this wine is fortified and then some. Like a bank vault. With a port cullis and a moat. And men with blazing arrows in the turrets. And wild fire. And the Hound from Game of Thrones, as well as the little lass with the needle.
I make no bones about it, I bloody love this stuff. I think it's brilliant. It's a great 'that time of the month' drink. What's not to like?
"This is grain, which any fool can eat, but for which the Lord intended a more divine means of consumption. Let us give praise to our maker, and glory to His bounty, by learning about... beer."
Apart from sounding like they'd benefit well from being delivered in a Jeremy Clarkson tone, I always think these words apply equally to a certain other alcoholic drink.
Substitute 'grain' for 'grapes', and 'beer' for 'wine' – or rather, Buckfast Tonic Wine – and indeed give praise to God. For this is a tipple that has the hand of God in it. Like, almost literally.
Made by Benedictine monks at Buckfast Abbey in Devon, the eponymous beverage was originally created by the French clerics who settled at the Abbey in the 19th century. Fortifying a base wine from Spain with ingredients that give it its tonic properties, the monks continue to manufacture the wine according to a traditional French recipe.
Described on the label as a 'red wine-based aperitif', Buckfast was originally sold as medicine, before it was re-marketed for a wider appeal. Now it is sold not only in the Abbey's own produce shop, but also nationwide and around the world.
Although you do have to look for it. Not everywhere stocks it, and when you do find somewhere that sells it, the lure of that distinctive orange label can prove hard to resist (at least for me). When I'm in the mood for it, it's as if I'm being pulled by the sound of a heavenly choir (a bit like the one used for the HBO ident: I know! I can't believe it's had that many views either).
And no wonder. This is exactly the sort of thing you can imagine them all drinking in Game of Thrones. Perhaps due to it not being widely available, and to its slightly dubious reputation, Buckfast tonic wine is acquiring a mythology all of its own. Having become associated with binge drinkers in Scotland, earning (according to Wikipedia) nicknames such as 'Wreck the Hoose Juice' and 'Commotion Lotion', it is also apparently popular with 'working class, student and bohemian communities in the United Kingdom and Ireland'.
 |
'Aperitif' it may say (perhaps due to its French background), but this is no dainty pre-dinner drink. This is a hardcore, filthy dirty, slaggy drink. If you're feeling frail it really does pick you up. 'Wreck the hoose juice'? In this house we call it 'liquid cocaine' (prompting me to go all Mrs Doyle: "Are you sure, Father? There's cocaine in it!")
I find Buckie easy to drink (as do I imagine, many others), not just because of its effects, but also because of its taste. Like its label, the flavour is distinctive, unusual, and unlike any other wine you're likely to taste (get a load. Seriously. Do. Get a load). Sort of sweet, aniseedy, mixed with Irn Bru and Pepto Bismol. It's a wine made not just from girders, but a shitload of caffeine, and a dead mouse, probably. Who cares? This is wine on steroids. And I like it.
The last time I poured myself a glass of this thick, red-tinged, rusty brown liquor Guy Garvey on 6 Music played Elvis Costello's Pump It Up (I kid you not – there's only one dance you can do to that, a sort of jerky running on the spot, arms bent, head jerking from side to side). If I was feeling low beforehand, I wasn't anymore. It picks me up even when I'm on my period, that's how hard it is. Buckfast tonic wine is even capable of taking police to court. Yeah.
This is beyond wine. I mean, what makes wine wine is all there – grapes, an alcoholic content, and stuff. But oh, it's so much more than that. Rather like port, this wine is fortified and then some. Like a bank vault. With a port cullis and a moat. And men with blazing arrows in the turrets. And wild fire. And the Hound from Game of Thrones, as well as the little lass with the needle.
I make no bones about it, I bloody love this stuff. I think it's brilliant. It's a great 'that time of the month' drink. What's not to like?
Comments
Post a Comment